2 a.-fucking-m.

Ah....a long, slow sigh due to the fact that it is 2:11 a.-fucking-m. and I am not asleep. Caused by the tan iced espresso mocha I drank six hours ago...I doubt it. My vacation is over :( But, I now have money to burn which everyone who knows me knows I am all to good at doing...So maybe this time I will surprise myself and put a good chunk of it into savings :) I just got back from beautiful Mesa Verde a few days ago, a lovely, spiritual place. The drive to and from both incredible and peaceful and painful, lol. Incredible that there are sights such as those to be driven through, peaceful because it was me, a few cigarettes and random passing cars on my 6 hr drive back and painful because of my sprained quad...not fun when it's your driving leg. I credit that short self journey with giving me the energy to tell my ex to basically go fuck himself...only in nicer words. Seriously, I am soooo done with that shit. I am not playing that game anymore. Everything poisonous in my life is cut the fuck out and only things with good juju are being allowed in. Only things that will contribute to the bettering of myself are allowed into my space. I am strong again, I am the girl that I loved...well in partial form...certain things will take more time to shape up, but mentally I am almost 100% back to that hopeful, bright eyed college girl pre-fucked up relationship, and ready, once again, to take on the world. I am writing again, painting and trying to help my aunt illustrate her childrens book. I feel better than i have in a long time, clearer. I have the biggest crush on this guy who I barely get to see and it is great because it is motivating me to get into better shape which has been an issue since I destroyed the ligaments in my foot a few years ago. Luckily, that is now mostly healed and I can get back to some of my favorite things, hiking and dancing and just enjoying life. So, there is my random ass 10 minute 2 a.m. rant. Night, night. Hopefully....